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00:00:02,069 --> 00:00:04,970
♪ It seems today
that all you see
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00:00:05,039 --> 00:00:08,140
♪ Is violence in movies
and sex on TV
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00:00:08,209 --> 00:00:11,776
♪ But where are those
good old-fashioned values
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00:00:11,845 --> 00:00:14,846
♪ On which we used to rely?
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♪ Lucky there's a family guy
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♪ Lucky there's a man who
positively can do
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♪ All the things
that make us
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♪ Laugh and cry
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00:00:24,825 --> 00:00:29,994
♪ He's a family guy ♪
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00:00:35,102 --> 00:00:37,180
We now return
to the All in the Family
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00:00:37,204 --> 00:00:39,771
and Modern Family
crossover episode.
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00:00:39,840 --> 00:00:42,340
Hello, Mr. Bunker.
We brought some hummus.
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Oh, yeah,
I knew them two
was hummus
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the minute they
walked in the door.
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Yay! A crossover always
brings out the best
in each show!
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It certainly doesn't
smack of desperation.
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00:00:52,453 --> 00:00:54,498
The priorities
are always creative,
18
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and not driven
by marketing or...
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Okay, that's enough.
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Oh, my God!
What is it, Peter?
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Look at this.
Dennis the Menace
is just shoveling snow.
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He's being helpful.
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00:01:03,831 --> 00:01:06,931
Might as well just
call it Dennis now.
He's not a menace.
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00:01:07,000 --> 00:01:09,033
Not every strip is
gonna be hilarious.
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You know something?
I could do better
than these idiots.
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I should just go
down to the paper
and sell them my own.
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Well, Peter,
you might be underestimating
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the difficulty of
writing a comic strip.
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As someone who occasionally
dates the creative muse,
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I can vouch for
the unforgiving face
of a blank sheet of paper.
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In fact, I think it was
William Faulkner who said...
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I'm back.
I'm published.
Check it out.
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I call my comic For Pete's Sake,
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because it points out things
that make you shake
your head and say,
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"For Pete's sake."
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This one's for tomorrow.
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These are good, Peter.
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I like how you
retell tired old gags
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with a detached,
ironic approach.
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Yeah, plus,
it's all brand-new jokes
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that I'm really,
really serious about.
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Well, good for you, Peter,
but how did you get
published so quickly?
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Ah, the editor of
the paper owed me a favor.
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I got him
a picture of Spider-Man.
45
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Why can't anyone get me
a picture of the Spider-Man?
46
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Here you go.
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00:02:06,426 --> 00:02:09,494
Yeah, I got a whole subreddit
of superhero thong shots.
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Here's your beer, Peter.
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00:02:15,268 --> 00:02:16,779
Thanks, Jerome.
What do I owe you?
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No, you already
paid me, in laughs.
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I do a lot of island ones.
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Peter, you should do one
where a baseball player
can't steal second,
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'cause he's on probation.
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For drug crimes.
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Political.
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Yeah, you put
an island in there,
you're in business.
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00:02:35,622 --> 00:02:38,590
Hey, how about one
where you draw a sock,
and it says "Sock it to me,"
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or-or maybe draw
Lois taking
a hot-tub dump,
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and she just says whatever?
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00:02:49,069 --> 00:02:52,637
Peter, your comic in
this morning's paper
is really offensive.
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That's not funny, Peter.
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Ah, you're just
not getting it, Lois.
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See, his wife
washed dishes for him.
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Oh, for Pete's sake.
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Aha! There you go.
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00:03:06,787 --> 00:03:08,419
Peter, you should see this.
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00:03:08,488 --> 00:03:10,934
Your dishwasher cartoon
has really outraged
the online community.
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What?
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Gosh, it's not like
the Internet to go crazy
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00:03:14,128 --> 00:03:15,705
about something
small and stupid.
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Peter, you have to apologize.
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What, because of a joke?
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00:03:18,665 --> 00:03:21,432
Not just a joke,
Peter. A joke that
angered some bloggers.
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Well, I guess this ain't
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the first time I got in trouble
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for something I
said about a woman.
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Oh, good.
We can steal.
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And welcome back to The Flow.
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We're talking to Peter Griffin,
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00:03:38,518 --> 00:03:40,218
the artist behind
For Pete's Sake,
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which has caused outrage
with a misogynistic comic.
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Here's a video of some outrage.
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00:03:50,798 --> 00:03:52,742
Yeah, those boos
don't hurt so much
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'cause you spent two
minutes of the last segment
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applauding a red velvet cake.
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00:04:00,140 --> 00:04:03,341
And if that's not bad enough,
this morning's cartoon
is even worse.
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00:04:03,409 --> 00:04:04,409
Let's put that up.
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00:04:10,884 --> 00:04:14,186
Mr. Griffin,
do you really think this
is an appropriate cartoon
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00:04:14,254 --> 00:04:16,521
to run on Gloria
Steinem's half-birthday?
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00:04:16,590 --> 00:04:19,069
You sound angry.
Did one of your
friends get engaged?
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00:04:19,093 --> 00:04:21,859
You have no idea
how offensive you are
to women, do you?
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00:04:21,928 --> 00:04:23,228
What? I love women.
93
00:04:23,297 --> 00:04:25,241
I bet I can name more
porn stars than you.
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00:04:25,265 --> 00:04:27,410
But don't tell my wife
how many porn stars I know.
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00:04:27,434 --> 00:04:28,578
I'll get in a lot of trouble.
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00:04:28,602 --> 00:04:30,213
I know all of them, though.
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00:04:30,237 --> 00:04:32,937
There are people
who just started an hour ago,
and I know them.
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00:04:35,909 --> 00:04:37,554
Your cartoon is sexist!
99
00:04:37,578 --> 00:04:39,244
Down with misogyny!
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00:04:39,313 --> 00:04:43,115
It wasn't even funny,
and I have a great
sense of humor.
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00:04:43,183 --> 00:04:45,250
Man, they seem really upset.
102
00:04:45,319 --> 00:04:47,230
I was just trying
to make people laugh.
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00:04:47,254 --> 00:04:48,965
Dad, I'm worried
they're gonna hurt us.
104
00:04:48,989 --> 00:04:51,429
No, no, they're angry,
Chris, but they ain't
gonna get violent.
105
00:04:52,292 --> 00:04:53,636
Oh, cool!
That brick I ordered.
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00:04:55,329 --> 00:04:57,873
Wait a minute.
I didn't order this brick.
You may be right, Chris.
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00:04:57,897 --> 00:04:59,709
Peter, this is
getting out of hand.
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00:04:59,733 --> 00:05:01,478
I don't feel safe
in my own home.
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00:05:01,502 --> 00:05:03,479
Maybe we should
get out of Quahog
for a while.
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00:05:03,503 --> 00:05:04,770
You know, she's right.
111
00:05:04,838 --> 00:05:06,615
We should get out of town
till this all blows over.
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00:05:06,639 --> 00:05:08,406
Okay, we'll go,
but just give me a minute.
113
00:05:08,475 --> 00:05:10,808
I just want to turn in
my last For Pete's Sake.
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00:05:12,479 --> 00:05:14,224
I'm like Michael Jordan,
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00:05:14,248 --> 00:05:16,981
going out on top amid
a flurry of gambling rumors.
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Peter, where are we?
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00:05:32,399 --> 00:05:33,810
I don't know.
I just woke up, too.
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00:05:33,834 --> 00:05:35,478
I tied
the steering wheel
to my belt.
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00:05:35,502 --> 00:05:38,014
I figure we've
been on the road
about 20% of the time.
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00:05:38,038 --> 00:05:40,672
Dad, how long until
we can go back home?
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00:05:40,741 --> 00:05:43,419
Um, I don't know.
How long do
women hold grudges?
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Not very long, I'm guessing.
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00:05:45,412 --> 00:05:48,713
Oh, Peter,
we've been driving all night.
Pull over to that gas station.
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We can use the bathroom
and stretch our legs.
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00:05:50,851 --> 00:05:52,051
You got it, babe.
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Did you call me "babe"?
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I did.
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00:05:54,888 --> 00:05:56,087
Oh, Peter.
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00:05:57,824 --> 00:05:59,257
Ew, Mom!
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You'll never have this, Meg.
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00:06:05,165 --> 00:06:06,710
All right,
back in the car, kids.
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00:06:06,734 --> 00:06:08,345
For this leg of the trip,
I was thinking of
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00:06:08,369 --> 00:06:10,868
driving with my shirt off
like New Mexico trash.
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00:06:14,307 --> 00:06:16,252
Oh, my God!
Our car!
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00:06:16,276 --> 00:06:17,542
Someone's stealing it.
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00:06:17,611 --> 00:06:18,876
Oh, crap!
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00:06:18,945 --> 00:06:20,590
Although, I got to say,
you never get to see
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00:06:20,614 --> 00:06:22,191
somebody else driving your car.
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00:06:22,215 --> 00:06:23,792
It's kind of cool.
Kind of weird.
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00:06:23,816 --> 00:06:27,285
We're stuck here, Peter!
And we don't even
know where we are.
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00:06:27,354 --> 00:06:28,753
Well, there's a sign.
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00:06:46,239 --> 00:06:48,573
Huh, guess we're in a town
called Springfield.
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00:06:48,641 --> 00:06:50,520
Springfield, eh?
What state?
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00:06:50,544 --> 00:06:52,384
I can't imagine
we're allowed to say.
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00:07:16,236 --> 00:07:19,637
Well, this Springfield
place seems nice.
We should visit here again.
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00:07:19,706 --> 00:07:21,750
I don't know, Lois.
This seems like
a one-shot deal.
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00:07:21,774 --> 00:07:23,319
Guys, we ain't here
for fun, all right?
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00:07:23,343 --> 00:07:25,743
We're here to find the police,
report our stolen car.
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00:07:25,812 --> 00:07:27,245
Oh, and don't drink the water.
150
00:07:27,314 --> 00:07:29,548
Everybody around here
looks like they
have hepatitis.
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00:07:29,616 --> 00:07:32,551
Dad, I'm starving.
Can we get some food?
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00:07:32,619 --> 00:07:34,619
Lois, whip out your boob,
give the boy his lunch.
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Listen to the man.
154
00:07:36,189 --> 00:07:37,634
Yeah, Lois, listen to the man.
155
00:07:37,658 --> 00:07:39,558
How about we just go
into that store there?
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Uh, excuse me?
157
00:07:46,099 --> 00:07:48,200
Hello. Welcome
to the Kwik-E-Mart.
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Oh, I am so sorry.
Let me unplug that.
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00:07:53,674 --> 00:07:55,973
Oh, such a nuisance!
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00:07:56,042 --> 00:07:57,587
Hello, funny-sounding Cleveland.
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00:07:57,611 --> 00:07:59,054
What's the specialty
of the house?
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To you, I recommend the donut.
163
00:08:03,950 --> 00:08:05,183
Ooh!
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00:08:05,251 --> 00:08:06,284
Yum!
165
00:08:06,353 --> 00:08:08,953
Have you guys seriously
never heard of donuts?
166
00:08:09,022 --> 00:08:10,533
These are made fresh every day.
167
00:08:10,557 --> 00:08:13,068
And then,
several days later,
we receive them
168
00:08:13,092 --> 00:08:14,837
and make them
available for purchase.
169
00:08:14,861 --> 00:08:16,539
Hey, are these...
Are these free?
170
00:08:16,563 --> 00:08:19,363
'Cause I forgot to mention,
all our money is
in our stolen car.
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00:08:19,433 --> 00:08:21,043
Thank you.
Come again.
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00:08:21,067 --> 00:08:24,002
Sir, we can pay you
back for the donuts
when we find our car.
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00:08:24,071 --> 00:08:26,182
Do you think
that I am moved
by your sob story?
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00:08:26,206 --> 00:08:27,950
I come from
a country
where the words
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00:08:27,974 --> 00:08:29,652
for "sewage" and
"beverage" are the same.
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I'll pay for their donuts.
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00:08:35,915 --> 00:08:37,682
Thank you so much, sir.
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For what?
I didn't say anything.
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Oh.
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00:08:40,454 --> 00:08:42,134
It was me.
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00:08:45,692 --> 00:08:48,559
How come this
convenience store
has so many shadowy parts?
182
00:08:48,629 --> 00:08:52,030
Apu, a dozen donuts
for our albino visitors.
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00:08:52,099 --> 00:08:53,264
Wow! For real?
184
00:08:53,333 --> 00:08:56,368
No man should be so poor
he cannot pay for a donut.
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00:08:56,436 --> 00:08:59,371
I was once you.
I couldn't afford donuts.
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00:08:59,439 --> 00:09:00,650
Tell them what I did, Apu.
187
00:09:00,674 --> 00:09:01,973
He stole the donuts.
188
00:09:02,041 --> 00:09:03,441
I stole the donuts.
189
00:09:03,510 --> 00:09:05,154
So, here you go.
12...
190
00:09:05,178 --> 00:09:06,823
Ten...
Eight donuts.
191
00:09:06,847 --> 00:09:08,780
That's very nice
of you, Mister...
192
00:09:08,849 --> 00:09:10,882
Simpson. Homer Simpson.
193
00:09:10,950 --> 00:09:13,385
We're the Griffins.
Peter, Lois, Stewie,
194
00:09:13,453 --> 00:09:15,293
and then, uh, you know,
the others.
195
00:09:15,622 --> 00:09:16,654
Brian, I guess.
196
00:09:16,723 --> 00:09:18,923
Well, enjoy your six donuts.
197
00:09:20,493 --> 00:09:23,161
Mmm. Yummy. Donut.
198
00:09:23,230 --> 00:09:25,550
That's pretty good,
but try it like this.
199
00:09:26,699 --> 00:09:29,067
Mmm. Donut.
200
00:09:30,603 --> 00:09:33,304
Mmm. Donut.
201
00:09:33,373 --> 00:09:37,541
I think
you and I are gonna
get along just okay.
202
00:09:44,284 --> 00:09:45,694
Yeah, all right, we'll be there.
203
00:09:45,718 --> 00:09:47,029
But if you want to
save us a little time,
204
00:09:47,053 --> 00:09:49,413
you can start tracing
his body with chalk.
205
00:09:51,424 --> 00:09:53,344
This is the police station.
206
00:09:53,393 --> 00:09:57,962
Be careful.
I think some of
them might be cops.
207
00:09:58,030 --> 00:10:00,030
Oh, hey there.
Cool hat, weird nose.
208
00:10:00,099 --> 00:10:02,734
Hey, listen,
my car got stolen. I was
hoping you could help.
209
00:10:02,802 --> 00:10:06,404
Well, we got a procedure
for handling alleged
crimes around here.
210
00:10:06,473 --> 00:10:07,805
Let's see. Uh...
211
00:10:07,874 --> 00:10:10,419
Did you contribute to
the policeman's ball?
No.
212
00:10:10,443 --> 00:10:12,921
Oh, that's too bad,
'cause he really
needs one.
213
00:10:12,945 --> 00:10:14,657
He had an accident last week.
214
00:10:14,681 --> 00:10:17,649
Yeah, I tried to jump
over a parking meter.
215
00:10:17,717 --> 00:10:19,750
Yeah, all right,
well, with no contribution,
216
00:10:19,819 --> 00:10:22,179
your report goes right
into the circular file.
217
00:10:23,290 --> 00:10:25,801
I got to be honest.
I don't usually
check this file,
218
00:10:25,825 --> 00:10:28,859
so it might be a while
until we find
that car of yours.
219
00:10:28,928 --> 00:10:31,996
Uh, Chief, that excuse
to leave you asked for
is here.
220
00:10:32,065 --> 00:10:35,105
Oh, sorry,
I got to take this.
It never ends.
221
00:10:39,572 --> 00:10:42,874
Oh, thank you so
much for putting us up
until we find our car.
222
00:10:42,942 --> 00:10:46,044
And thank you for not being
a band of hippie murderers.
223
00:10:46,113 --> 00:10:47,222
And now this again.
224
00:10:47,246 --> 00:10:49,714
You bring home
two bands of hippie murderers,
225
00:10:49,783 --> 00:10:51,782
and suddenly,
that's all you're about.
226
00:10:51,851 --> 00:10:53,896
Well, what do you say
we have some lunch?
227
00:10:53,920 --> 00:10:55,220
Where's Bart?
228
00:10:55,288 --> 00:10:56,566
Well, he's at camp all week.
229
00:10:56,590 --> 00:10:58,630
I'm sorry you
won't get to meet him.
230
00:11:03,329 --> 00:11:04,729
Got kicked out of camp.
231
00:11:04,798 --> 00:11:06,931
I superglued my counselor's
butt cheeks together.
232
00:11:07,701 --> 00:11:09,000
That's terrible.
233
00:11:09,069 --> 00:11:11,936
But how did you even
get access to his butt cheeks?
234
00:11:12,005 --> 00:11:14,272
I'm not the only one
who got kicked out of camp.
235
00:11:14,341 --> 00:11:15,606
This is Bart.
236
00:11:15,675 --> 00:11:18,309
Honey, your hands are filthy.
Go wash up for lunch.
237
00:11:18,377 --> 00:11:20,211
Eat my shorts!
238
00:11:20,280 --> 00:11:22,346
"Eat my shorts."
I love that!
239
00:11:22,416 --> 00:11:24,549
Is that a popular expression,
like "What the deuce"?
240
00:11:24,618 --> 00:11:26,017
Probably more popular.
241
00:11:26,085 --> 00:11:27,986
Probably...
Probably way more popular.
242
00:11:29,089 --> 00:11:30,889
Well, here's my room.
243
00:11:30,957 --> 00:11:32,757
Hey, you want to
see my weapons closet?
244
00:11:32,825 --> 00:11:34,585
You have a weapons closet, too?
245
00:11:43,070 --> 00:11:46,070
Ouch!
Jesus heard my mean thought!
246
00:11:46,139 --> 00:11:48,673
A slingshot!
It's so simple and pure.
247
00:11:48,742 --> 00:11:50,808
He doesn't need
lasers or time machines,
248
00:11:50,877 --> 00:11:53,545
just gum balls and marbles
and balls of string.
249
00:11:53,613 --> 00:11:55,324
He's like something
out of Mark Twain!
250
00:11:55,348 --> 00:11:57,749
Whose real name
was Samuel Clemens.
251
00:11:57,817 --> 00:12:00,084
How does that
further this
conversation?
252
00:12:00,153 --> 00:12:01,831
Hey, you want to
make a prank phone call?
253
00:12:01,855 --> 00:12:03,087
Ooh, prank phone call!
254
00:12:08,361 --> 00:12:09,939
Moe's Tavern.
Moe speaking.
255
00:12:09,963 --> 00:12:13,063
Uh, yeah,
I'm looking for a friend,
last name Keebum,
256
00:12:13,132 --> 00:12:14,265
first name Lee.
257
00:12:14,334 --> 00:12:15,444
Hang on, I'll check.
258
00:12:15,468 --> 00:12:17,669
Hey, guys, do I got
a Lee Keebum?
259
00:12:17,738 --> 00:12:20,438
Come on, look at the stools,
is there a Lee Keebum?
260
00:12:20,506 --> 00:12:23,173
Somebody check the rear.
I know I got a Lee Keebum.
261
00:12:23,242 --> 00:12:25,509
Then you probably
shouldn't be handling food.
262
00:12:29,248 --> 00:12:32,383
Oh, my God, that's amazing!
That's the coolest thing ever!
263
00:12:32,451 --> 00:12:34,329
Hey, I want to try.
Okay.
264
00:12:36,856 --> 00:12:37,896
Moe's Tavern.
265
00:12:37,958 --> 00:12:40,024
Hello, Moe?
Your sister's being raped.
266
00:12:40,860 --> 00:12:42,860
Is that...
Is that one?
267
00:12:43,696 --> 00:12:46,698
So, this is my room.
Please excuse the mess.
268
00:12:46,766 --> 00:12:48,966
Hmm. There,
that's better.
269
00:12:49,035 --> 00:12:52,537
Look at all these trophies!
There must be,
like, 20 of them!
270
00:12:52,606 --> 00:12:55,974
Twenty-three.
But I'm sure you have
a lot of trophies of your own.
271
00:12:56,042 --> 00:12:58,375
No. I'm not good
at anything.
272
00:12:58,444 --> 00:13:00,979
Oh, Meg, I'm sure
you're good at something.
273
00:13:01,047 --> 00:13:02,714
We just have to
find out what it is.
274
00:13:02,782 --> 00:13:07,085
After all, Nelson Mandela
said it's our obligation
to shine.
275
00:13:07,153 --> 00:13:09,298
You mean like my
oily face and back?
276
00:13:09,322 --> 00:13:11,522
No. Maybe don't sit
on my bedspread, please.
277
00:13:11,591 --> 00:13:14,558
But I mean
the light within you
that makes you an individual.
278
00:13:14,628 --> 00:13:16,961
Meg, you need to
know that you matter.
279
00:13:17,030 --> 00:13:20,142
Really? No one's
ever told me
I mattered before.
280
00:13:20,166 --> 00:13:21,666
That's why you have to say it.
281
00:13:21,735 --> 00:13:22,735
So say it.
282
00:13:22,802 --> 00:13:23,834
I matter.
283
00:13:23,903 --> 00:13:24,903
Louder!
284
00:13:24,971 --> 00:13:26,236
I matter!
285
00:13:26,305 --> 00:13:28,265
Shut up, Meg!
You don't matter!
286
00:13:46,926 --> 00:13:49,727
Hey, couldn't help but notice
there's no seat for me.
287
00:13:49,796 --> 00:13:53,363
Oh, I was under the impression
that you were a dog.
288
00:13:53,433 --> 00:13:55,473
You're right to have
that reaction, Marge.
289
00:13:55,535 --> 00:13:57,768
Why, I just figured,
at home I sit
290
00:13:57,837 --> 00:13:59,514
with the family,
so I assumed that...
291
00:13:59,538 --> 00:14:01,706
Have you ever
drunk out of a toilet?
292
00:14:01,775 --> 00:14:03,953
I don't see what
that has to do
with the discussion.
293
00:14:03,977 --> 00:14:05,776
Dogs eat in the kitchen.
294
00:14:05,845 --> 00:14:09,113
Yeah, dogs eat in the kitchen.
295
00:14:09,182 --> 00:14:12,361
You know, you're eating
mostly horse hooves
and tallow, right?
296
00:14:12,385 --> 00:14:13,495
You cool with that?
297
00:14:13,519 --> 00:14:14,964
Oh, and the ones
that fall on the floor,
298
00:14:14,988 --> 00:14:16,332
you just eat those up, too, huh?
299
00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:18,189
Oh, yeah, yeah, you do.
300
00:14:18,258 --> 00:14:21,325
So, is that...
Is that, like, your thing?
You eat loud?
301
00:14:22,996 --> 00:14:25,196
I'm sorry, I don't know what...
302
00:14:25,265 --> 00:14:26,541
That's a gutter language.
303
00:14:26,565 --> 00:14:28,699
Are you making friends
in there, Brian?
304
00:14:28,768 --> 00:14:30,746
Yeah, he's a lot of laughs.
305
00:14:30,770 --> 00:14:33,004
Wow, you work at
a nuclear power plant?
306
00:14:33,073 --> 00:14:34,750
What's that?
I don't know.
307
00:14:34,774 --> 00:14:37,653
Pretty impressive.
I just work
at a brewery.
308
00:14:37,677 --> 00:14:42,380
Oh, my God,
you get to work with beer?
Wow! What's beer really like?
309
00:14:42,448 --> 00:14:44,582
Eh, he's got a big head.
310
00:14:44,650 --> 00:14:47,563
Hey, you know...
Aw, damn it, I don't have
a comic strip anymore.
311
00:14:47,587 --> 00:14:51,088
So, still no word
from the police on
your stolen car?
312
00:14:51,157 --> 00:14:53,257
The cops here are a joke.
313
00:14:53,325 --> 00:14:56,093
I bet you and me
can find your car
on our own.
314
00:14:56,162 --> 00:14:57,706
You think so?
Yeah.
315
00:14:57,730 --> 00:15:01,499
'Cause Homer
Simpson and Peter Griffin
are a great team!
316
00:15:01,568 --> 00:15:03,901
A greater team than...
317
00:15:03,970 --> 00:15:05,102
Than...
318
00:15:05,171 --> 00:15:08,272
Uh-huh, keep going.
Than... Something else.
319
00:15:08,341 --> 00:15:11,342
Something else?
I don't know what this is.
320
00:15:11,410 --> 00:15:12,721
Okay, I'll do it.
321
00:15:12,745 --> 00:15:14,557
Homer Simpson and
Peter Griffin are
322
00:15:14,581 --> 00:15:16,725
an even greater team
than the Air Force!
323
00:15:19,185 --> 00:15:21,218
Hold steady.
I got him in my sights.
324
00:15:26,192 --> 00:15:28,092
Whoo-hoo!
Yeah!
325
00:15:28,161 --> 00:15:29,360
Yeah, we did it.
326
00:15:29,429 --> 00:15:30,872
What's he doing here?
327
00:15:30,896 --> 00:15:33,041
We got to carry him,
'cause he can't
fly on his own.
328
00:15:33,065 --> 00:15:35,265
We let that other guy try,
and look what happened.
329
00:15:36,002 --> 00:15:38,836
No, no, no, no, no, no!
330
00:15:43,709 --> 00:15:47,245
Wow, they've made
a lot of changes
to Quahog!
331
00:15:47,313 --> 00:15:48,857
Chris, we're in
a different town.
332
00:15:48,881 --> 00:15:50,048
Oh...
333
00:15:50,116 --> 00:15:52,583
Is that why there
was blood in my stool?
334
00:15:52,652 --> 00:15:54,919
No. That sounds
like a separate issue.
335
00:15:54,988 --> 00:15:56,665
God, I can't believe I got stuck
336
00:15:56,689 --> 00:15:58,334
taking their
stupid dog
for a walk.
337
00:15:58,358 --> 00:16:01,359
Stupid?
Well, I don't know,
I think he's kind of fun.
338
00:16:01,428 --> 00:16:03,339
What, are you kidding?
He doesn't do anything.
339
00:16:03,363 --> 00:16:04,941
You know,
it's not his fault, though.
340
00:16:04,965 --> 00:16:08,299
He doesn't know
any better. He's been on
a leash his whole life.
341
00:16:08,367 --> 00:16:10,802
Hey, you know what?
Come here,
Santa's Stupid Name.
342
00:16:10,870 --> 00:16:12,870
You're a grown dog,
start acting like one.
343
00:16:17,243 --> 00:16:18,476
Come here, boy.
344
00:16:20,280 --> 00:16:21,512
Hey, stop that dog!
345
00:16:22,882 --> 00:16:24,682
Sorry. We're on
a smoke break.
346
00:16:27,620 --> 00:16:30,020
Nothing beats
smoking and standing.
347
00:16:30,089 --> 00:16:33,458
Although smoking and sitting
does have its moments.
348
00:16:33,526 --> 00:16:36,060
You always have
to argue with me.
349
00:16:41,767 --> 00:16:43,101
Oh, thank goodness!
350
00:16:43,169 --> 00:16:46,137
I was starting to think
you wouldn't show, Dr. Dog.
351
00:16:51,377 --> 00:16:54,045
Boy, you really like
to bleed, huh, guy?
352
00:17:01,287 --> 00:17:03,821
Hey, there's a dog
in the dining area!
353
00:17:04,790 --> 00:17:07,425
How'd that happen?
Get back in there.
354
00:17:12,865 --> 00:17:14,443
Which one is
Santa's Little Helper?
355
00:17:14,467 --> 00:17:16,700
I don't know.
You're the one who
sniffed his butt.
356
00:17:16,769 --> 00:17:18,381
Yeah, for, like, a second!
357
00:17:20,973 --> 00:17:22,418
Damn it, he's gone.
358
00:17:22,442 --> 00:17:23,642
We're screwed.
359
00:17:23,710 --> 00:17:26,511
Welcome to Krusty Burger.
May I take your order?
360
00:17:26,579 --> 00:17:28,659
Your voice sounds stupid.
361
00:17:49,802 --> 00:17:51,402
Oh, my God, that was great!
362
00:17:51,471 --> 00:17:53,815
I mean,
unless you think it sucked,
in which case it sucked.
363
00:17:53,839 --> 00:17:54,983
It was all right, dude.
364
00:17:55,007 --> 00:17:56,340
Yeah, dude.
365
00:17:56,409 --> 00:17:58,142
So, you know,
um, I'm only wearing
366
00:17:58,211 --> 00:17:59,877
this diaper as a dare, you know.
367
00:17:59,946 --> 00:18:01,446
It's not,
like, an everyday thing.
368
00:18:01,514 --> 00:18:05,349
Hey, loser, I copied
off your spelling test
and got a D!
369
00:18:06,786 --> 00:18:08,285
Ha, ha!
370
00:18:08,354 --> 00:18:11,088
I say, how long has
that boy been treating
you like that?
371
00:18:11,156 --> 00:18:14,725
Uh... About 24 years.
372
00:18:23,502 --> 00:18:25,736
Just who I was looking for!
373
00:18:31,711 --> 00:18:33,110
Cowabunga.
374
00:18:39,285 --> 00:18:40,651
All right, Peter,
375
00:18:40,719 --> 00:18:43,039
if we're gonna find your car,
we got to think like a car.
376
00:18:43,088 --> 00:18:44,888
So let's fill up
at that gas station.
377
00:18:53,065 --> 00:18:54,365
I feel sick.
378
00:18:54,433 --> 00:18:56,578
Keep drinking.
I prepaid 40 bucks!
379
00:18:56,602 --> 00:18:58,402
Homer, maybe
we're doing this wrong.
380
00:19:02,575 --> 00:19:03,807
Oh, crap!
381
00:19:09,715 --> 00:19:12,749
Haben Sie Homer und Peter
mit Chevron pump?
382
00:19:18,591 --> 00:19:21,303
Okay, I got a great idea
how we're gonna
find my stolen car.
383
00:19:21,327 --> 00:19:24,428
We'll throw a car wash
free for stolen cars!
384
00:19:24,497 --> 00:19:27,398
And then when
we find it, we'll
actually charge the guy!
385
00:19:37,977 --> 00:19:42,813
Well, none of these is
my car, but we promised
these scumbags a show.
386
00:19:48,054 --> 00:19:49,054
♪ Hey
387
00:19:50,923 --> 00:19:51,923
♪ Hey
388
00:19:53,793 --> 00:19:54,793
♪ Hey
389
00:19:57,129 --> 00:20:00,030
♪ Love is like a bomb,
baby, come on, get it on
390
00:20:00,098 --> 00:20:02,867
♪ Livin' like
a lover with a radar phone
391
00:20:02,936 --> 00:20:05,536
♪ Lookin' like a tramp,
like a video vamp
392
00:20:05,605 --> 00:20:08,706
♪ Demolition woman,
can I be your man
393
00:20:11,144 --> 00:20:12,309
♪ Yeah
394
00:20:13,445 --> 00:20:16,847
♪ So come on, take a bottle
395
00:20:17,716 --> 00:20:19,449
♪ Shake it up
396
00:20:20,553 --> 00:20:23,087
♪ Break the bubble
397
00:20:23,155 --> 00:20:25,689
♪ Break it up
398
00:20:25,758 --> 00:20:28,859
♪ Pour some sugar on me
399
00:20:28,928 --> 00:20:31,328
♪ Ooh, in the name of love
400
00:20:31,397 --> 00:20:34,865
♪ Pour some sugar on me
401
00:20:34,934 --> 00:20:36,934
♪ Come on, fire me up
402
00:20:37,003 --> 00:20:40,504
♪ Pour your sugar on me
403
00:20:40,572 --> 00:20:42,840
♪ I can't get enough ♪
404
00:20:42,909 --> 00:20:45,977
Hey, Chief, we could arrest
every single car
thief in Springfield.
405
00:20:46,045 --> 00:20:49,013
After the show,
Lou, after the show.
406
00:21:01,427 --> 00:21:05,463
I don't know! I feel
like I'm good at nothing!
407
00:21:05,531 --> 00:21:08,599
Hey, everyone gets down
on themselves sometimes.
408
00:21:08,668 --> 00:21:11,869
Those are the days
I'm glad I have
my saxophone.
409
00:21:11,938 --> 00:21:13,037
Saxophone?
410
00:21:13,106 --> 00:21:14,817
Yeah. My dad
gave it to me.
411
00:21:14,841 --> 00:21:16,907
My dad once gave
me a gun to hide.
412
00:21:16,976 --> 00:21:18,742
That's terrible.
413
00:21:18,811 --> 00:21:21,089
Whenever I feel any
pain or loneliness,
414
00:21:21,113 --> 00:21:23,647
I just play away the blues
on my saxophone.
415
00:21:23,716 --> 00:21:25,916
Huh. I usually just
beat up a cat.
416
00:21:27,887 --> 00:21:30,654
Good thing we don't have a cat.
417
00:21:30,722 --> 00:21:33,042
Why don't you give it a shot?
418
00:22:09,995 --> 00:22:11,295
Was that good?
419
00:22:11,364 --> 00:22:13,308
It was okay,
but it would be a shame
420
00:22:13,332 --> 00:22:15,176
to waste such
great butcher's arms
421
00:22:15,200 --> 00:22:16,734
on a musical instrument.
422
00:22:25,211 --> 00:22:27,511
Wakey, wakey.
423
00:22:27,580 --> 00:22:30,614
Good morning.
You and I have
quite a day ahead of us.
424
00:22:42,595 --> 00:22:46,196
Oh, that's a clown
I painted, so you know
I'm truly insane.
425
00:22:47,800 --> 00:22:49,478
You know, Nelson, I don't doubt
426
00:22:49,502 --> 00:22:51,146
that you've had
a twisted childhood.
427
00:22:51,170 --> 00:22:54,771
Most evil people have.
Hitler, Manson, Jaden Smith.
428
00:22:54,840 --> 00:22:56,585
But you're different
from them, aren't you?
429
00:22:56,609 --> 00:22:59,143
Because they're rail-thin,
and you're fat.
430
00:22:59,211 --> 00:23:01,111
You're a little piggy,
aren't you, Nelson?
431
00:23:01,180 --> 00:23:02,979
In fact, I bet
you're hungry right now.
432
00:23:04,550 --> 00:23:05,649
What's that?
433
00:23:06,419 --> 00:23:07,485
I could eat.
434
00:23:07,553 --> 00:23:09,720
Good. Because
you're going to
435
00:23:09,789 --> 00:23:12,089
eat my shorts.
436
00:23:20,198 --> 00:23:22,466
Homer, you're never
going to believe what we did.
437
00:23:22,534 --> 00:23:25,569
We saw a movie in the afternoon!
438
00:23:25,638 --> 00:23:27,583
Yeah, we saw Surf's Up 2.
439
00:23:27,607 --> 00:23:30,285
Marge covered her eyes
every time
the penguins surfed.
440
00:23:30,309 --> 00:23:33,243
It made me nervous.
They could drown.
441
00:23:33,312 --> 00:23:35,946
Hey, where's
Santa's Little Helper?
442
00:23:36,015 --> 00:23:38,582
Brian, you took him
for a walk, right?
443
00:23:38,651 --> 00:23:40,250
Uh, yeah, yeah.
444
00:23:40,319 --> 00:23:42,252
More like he took me for a walk.
445
00:23:42,321 --> 00:23:44,654
God, what a fun dog.
446
00:23:44,723 --> 00:23:46,923
He's in the kitchen right now,
totally accounted for.
447
00:23:46,992 --> 00:23:48,225
Shut up.
448
00:23:48,294 --> 00:23:50,627
I'll go check on him right now.
449
00:23:50,696 --> 00:23:53,297
And Chris will come with me.
But nobody else!
450
00:23:58,737 --> 00:24:00,270
Ah, there he is!
451
00:24:00,339 --> 00:24:03,307
Aw, you like that
behind the ear,
don't you, boy?
452
00:24:06,112 --> 00:24:07,889
I'm another dog in here!
453
00:24:07,913 --> 00:24:09,291
What the hell are you doing?
454
00:24:09,315 --> 00:24:10,659
He's having a dog playdate.
455
00:24:10,683 --> 00:24:12,215
How does that help us?
456
00:24:12,285 --> 00:24:14,062
We're creating a broad story.
457
00:24:14,086 --> 00:24:16,887
Also, Matthew McConaughey
is in here, too!
458
00:24:18,123 --> 00:24:19,334
"All right,
all right, all right."
459
00:24:19,358 --> 00:24:21,158
No, no, he's not really in here!
460
00:24:21,227 --> 00:24:23,427
We thought it was him,
but it was just the oven!
461
00:24:23,496 --> 00:24:24,696
Now you're just doing voices.
462
00:24:24,764 --> 00:24:26,964
Jack Nicholson?
463
00:24:27,033 --> 00:24:30,367
Okay, Santa's Little Helper
got all tuckered
out from his playdate,
464
00:24:30,436 --> 00:24:32,937
so he went out back
to take a nap under
that tree
465
00:24:33,005 --> 00:24:34,571
where nobody knows
quite where it is.
466
00:24:34,640 --> 00:24:36,384
Hey, what happened
to Jack Nicholson
and that other dog?
467
00:24:36,408 --> 00:24:37,541
Yeah.
468
00:24:37,610 --> 00:24:40,143
Wait, aren't you supposed
to be looking for our car?
469
00:24:40,212 --> 00:24:43,480
Didn't find the car, Lois,
but I found a good time
with a good pal.
470
00:24:43,549 --> 00:24:44,781
Right, Homer?
471
00:24:44,850 --> 00:24:46,628
Hey, Quagmire who, right?
472
00:24:46,652 --> 00:24:48,318
Yeah, Quagmire who?
473
00:24:48,387 --> 00:24:51,088
That's an actual question.
I don't know who Quagmire is.
474
00:24:51,157 --> 00:24:54,458
Peter,
I'm glad you made a friend,
but what about our car?
475
00:24:54,527 --> 00:24:56,293
Yeah, I got an idea about that.
476
00:24:56,362 --> 00:24:59,629
What's the one surefire way
to find a lost car?
477
00:24:59,698 --> 00:25:00,775
Giant magnet?
478
00:25:00,799 --> 00:25:01,832
Giant magnet.
479
00:25:03,236 --> 00:25:04,436
Giant magnet?
480
00:25:07,239 --> 00:25:08,272
Check.
481
00:25:08,340 --> 00:25:09,985
Giant plug?
Check.
482
00:25:10,009 --> 00:25:11,608
Giant curbside outlet?
483
00:25:15,581 --> 00:25:18,248
Oh, things never work
the way they do on the box.
484
00:25:22,254 --> 00:25:24,288
Okay, let's get this garbage
out of the street.
485
00:25:28,460 --> 00:25:32,595
Oh, dear, I was
using that car as pants.
486
00:25:32,664 --> 00:25:34,575
Oh, my God, Dad, it's our car!
487
00:25:34,599 --> 00:25:38,034
That confused old guy
must have been
driving it by mistake.
488
00:25:38,103 --> 00:25:41,004
How many confused old guys
you got in this town?
489
00:25:43,643 --> 00:25:45,342
I'm old, so I'm the victim!
490
00:25:49,882 --> 00:25:52,160
Well, Homer,
thanks for helping
me get my car back.
491
00:25:52,184 --> 00:25:55,218
And to show my appreciation,
I got a little
something for you.
492
00:25:55,287 --> 00:25:57,587
Here you go.
Pawtucket Patriot Ale.
493
00:25:57,657 --> 00:25:59,690
The best Quahog has to offer.
494
00:25:59,759 --> 00:26:01,958
Always keep
an emergency six-pack
in my trunk.
495
00:26:02,027 --> 00:26:04,794
Oh, that's cool,
bringing outside
beer into my bar.
496
00:26:05,397 --> 00:26:06,557
Down the hatch!
497
00:26:08,867 --> 00:26:10,033
That's pretty good, right?
498
00:26:11,671 --> 00:26:13,437
No.
Huh?
499
00:26:13,505 --> 00:26:15,004
It's not good.
500
00:26:15,073 --> 00:26:18,408
This beer tastes
exactly like Duff.
It's just a lousy rip-off.
501
00:26:18,477 --> 00:26:21,011
Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa!
It's not a rip-off of Duff.
502
00:26:21,079 --> 00:26:23,380
It may have been
inspired by Duff, but I...
503
00:26:23,448 --> 00:26:25,649
I like to think it goes
in a different direction.
504
00:26:25,718 --> 00:26:29,197
No, this is just
the same as Duff,
but, like, worse.
505
00:26:29,221 --> 00:26:31,833
Hey, come on, now,
this is my favorite beer
you're talking about.
506
00:26:31,857 --> 00:26:34,190
Hell, I work for the company.
It's my livelihood.
507
00:26:34,259 --> 00:26:35,926
Oh, yeah?
Well, your livelihood
508
00:26:35,994 --> 00:26:37,594
is based on fraud.
Look at this.
509
00:26:38,631 --> 00:26:39,631
Huh?
510
00:26:41,133 --> 00:26:42,733
It is Duff.
511
00:26:42,801 --> 00:26:44,746
Your beer is in big trouble!
512
00:26:44,770 --> 00:26:46,314
You can't just slap a new label
513
00:26:46,338 --> 00:26:47,783
on something and
call it your own!
514
00:26:47,807 --> 00:26:49,740
Well, maybe Duff
should be in trouble for,
515
00:26:49,809 --> 00:26:51,709
you know, not being that great.
516
00:26:53,312 --> 00:26:55,445
Duff is an icon!
517
00:26:55,514 --> 00:26:57,614
Yeah, but some folks
prefer Pawtucket Pat.
518
00:26:57,683 --> 00:27:00,417
I mean, don't get me wrong,
I used to love Duff
when I was younger,
519
00:27:00,486 --> 00:27:03,420
but I haven't even had
it in, like, 13 years.
520
00:27:03,488 --> 00:27:06,756
Be that as it may,
I represent
the Duff Brewery,
521
00:27:06,825 --> 00:27:10,093
and you,
sir, as a representative
of Pawtucket Patriot Ale,
522
00:27:10,162 --> 00:27:13,397
are being sued for
intellectual theft
and patent infringement.
523
00:27:13,466 --> 00:27:15,666
Aha! Intellectual theft!
524
00:27:15,735 --> 00:27:17,834
What do you have
to say about that, Griffin?
525
00:27:17,903 --> 00:27:19,002
D'oh!
526
00:27:32,518 --> 00:27:35,452
The Pawtucket
Patriot Brewery being sued?
527
00:27:35,521 --> 00:27:37,921
It's the largest
employer in Quahog, Peter.
528
00:27:37,989 --> 00:27:40,356
A lot of people's
jobs are riding on this.
529
00:27:40,426 --> 00:27:42,692
Yeah, I got a job for you
riding on something.
530
00:27:42,761 --> 00:27:43,905
Peter!
Sorry!
531
00:27:43,929 --> 00:27:45,395
Sorry, Lois, I'm tired
532
00:27:45,464 --> 00:27:47,745
'cause we usually only
do these things
for half an hour.
533
00:27:50,068 --> 00:27:51,134
Simpson.
534
00:27:51,203 --> 00:27:52,269
Griffin.
535
00:27:52,337 --> 00:27:53,503
Nice day, isn't it?
536
00:27:53,572 --> 00:27:55,639
A nice day for
stabbing a friend in the back.
537
00:27:55,707 --> 00:27:58,947
Yeah, and a nice day
for bringing
thieves to justice.
538
00:28:00,212 --> 00:28:01,923
We're getting
a lot of compliments.
539
00:28:01,947 --> 00:28:03,546
Yeah,
we're doing something right.
540
00:28:07,319 --> 00:28:10,754
Your Honor,
citizens of Springfield
and visitors from Quahog,
541
00:28:10,822 --> 00:28:15,292
my client, the Duff Brewery,
is the victim of flagrant
intellectual theft.
542
00:28:15,360 --> 00:28:17,794
I'm whispering in
court to look smart.
543
00:28:17,863 --> 00:28:20,975
But it's not just
the main Duff recipe
that's been plagiarized.
544
00:28:20,999 --> 00:28:22,743
Several other Duff variations,
545
00:28:22,767 --> 00:28:26,904
packages and design elements
have been similarly infringed,
546
00:28:26,972 --> 00:28:29,973
resulting again and
again in pale imitations,
547
00:28:30,042 --> 00:28:34,043
cheap copies,
clumsy counterfeits
and weak substitutions.
548
00:28:34,813 --> 00:28:36,480
You like sex?
Eh.
549
00:28:36,548 --> 00:28:38,125
I don't think
we're very similar.
550
00:28:38,149 --> 00:28:40,750
You know why they got us
sitting next to each other.
551
00:28:40,819 --> 00:28:43,453
'Cause we're the two
funniest guys in our towns?
552
00:28:43,522 --> 00:28:45,189
Damn right.
553
00:28:45,257 --> 00:28:46,367
I'm a Jewish clown.
554
00:28:46,391 --> 00:28:47,758
Me, too.
555
00:28:47,827 --> 00:28:48,859
Are you a mayor?
556
00:28:48,928 --> 00:28:50,088
Yes, I am.
557
00:28:50,129 --> 00:28:52,129
Are you a "cool" mayor?
558
00:28:52,198 --> 00:28:54,164
I, uh...
I like to think so.
559
00:28:57,769 --> 00:28:59,202
You lived in Springfield?
560
00:28:59,270 --> 00:29:02,138
Yeah,
I worked at the Kwik-E-Mart,
researching a role.
561
00:29:02,207 --> 00:29:03,974
These guys are gonna lose.
562
00:29:04,042 --> 00:29:07,944
I've heard all I need
to hear to make a decision.
563
00:29:08,013 --> 00:29:11,315
If you ask me,
neither of these
beers is wholly original.
564
00:29:11,383 --> 00:29:15,285
They're both pale imitations
of my favorite beer, Bud Rock.
565
00:29:16,755 --> 00:29:20,457
But rendering a verdict
is something I'm paid to
566
00:29:20,526 --> 00:29:21,958
yabba-dabba-do!
567
00:29:22,027 --> 00:29:23,067
Eh.
568
00:29:23,129 --> 00:29:26,029
And I find in favor of Duff.
569
00:29:26,098 --> 00:29:27,742
Oh, no!
Oh, no!
570
00:29:27,766 --> 00:29:28,799
Oh, no!
571
00:29:32,671 --> 00:29:33,870
Hello?
572
00:29:33,939 --> 00:29:36,506
Uh, hey.
I'm in the wrong Springfield.
573
00:29:41,947 --> 00:29:43,759
So, what's going to happen now?
574
00:29:43,783 --> 00:29:46,383
Well, the Pawtucket Brewery
will be shut down,
575
00:29:46,451 --> 00:29:50,353
so I guess we got
to go back to Quahog
and find Peter a new job.
576
00:29:50,422 --> 00:29:51,821
Mmm, that's too bad.
577
00:29:51,890 --> 00:29:53,190
Yeah.
578
00:29:53,258 --> 00:29:55,625
Anyways, it was still nice
to meet you and your family,
579
00:29:55,694 --> 00:29:57,794
even though you kind
of screwed us over.
580
00:29:57,862 --> 00:29:59,040
Good to have you.
581
00:29:59,064 --> 00:30:01,331
And, hey, next time
you stay with a family,
582
00:30:01,400 --> 00:30:04,568
maybe you can wear a bra
some of the time.
583
00:30:04,636 --> 00:30:07,304
Hey, uh, Marge, uh,
584
00:30:07,373 --> 00:30:08,916
listen, there's
something difficult
585
00:30:08,940 --> 00:30:12,309
that I've been
trying to figure out
how to tell you, and um...
586
00:30:12,378 --> 00:30:14,812
It's about, uh,
Santa's Little Helper.
587
00:30:14,880 --> 00:30:16,079
What about him?
588
00:30:16,148 --> 00:30:17,748
He's, um...
589
00:30:20,252 --> 00:30:21,819
Right there.
590
00:30:21,887 --> 00:30:24,454
You were trying to figure out
a way to tell me that?
591
00:30:24,523 --> 00:30:26,334
I overthink things sometimes.
592
00:30:26,358 --> 00:30:28,926
Oh, and, look, he's
with Ed McMahon!
593
00:30:28,994 --> 00:30:32,095
"Hey-o! Here's Johnny!"
594
00:30:32,164 --> 00:30:33,364
Chris, we're done.
595
00:30:33,398 --> 00:30:36,867
You may be but,
"I'm just getting warmed up!"
596
00:30:36,935 --> 00:30:38,902
That's Al Pacino.
597
00:30:38,970 --> 00:30:40,615
Thanks for being so cool, Lisa.
598
00:30:40,639 --> 00:30:43,106
I cut your name in my arm
so I'll always remember you.
599
00:30:46,645 --> 00:30:48,723
Meg, I want you to have this.
600
00:30:48,747 --> 00:30:49,913
Your saxophone?
601
00:30:49,981 --> 00:30:51,381
Yes, Meg.
602
00:30:51,450 --> 00:30:54,651
When you played the saxophone,
I could feel your
soul coming out.
603
00:30:54,720 --> 00:30:57,520
So I want you to
take this and shine.
604
00:30:57,589 --> 00:31:01,258
Lisa, no one has ever done
anything this nice for me.
605
00:31:01,326 --> 00:31:04,728
You're amazing,
and I will never
be like you.
606
00:31:04,796 --> 00:31:07,830
I'm not pretty, I'm not smart,
I'm not talented.
607
00:31:07,899 --> 00:31:10,099
I have the same shoe size
as Charles Barkley.
608
00:31:10,168 --> 00:31:13,836
My prom date was
a scarecrow I stole,
and he left with someone else.
609
00:31:13,905 --> 00:31:15,505
The inside of my
hat smells so bad
610
00:31:15,574 --> 00:31:17,151
I'm not allowed in
most restaurants...
611
00:31:17,175 --> 00:31:18,295
Hey, hey!
612
00:31:18,877 --> 00:31:20,037
Shut up, Meg.
613
00:31:27,853 --> 00:31:31,087
No luggage.
Car's full. Let's go.
614
00:31:31,156 --> 00:31:32,623
Well, nice knowing you, Stewie.
615
00:31:32,691 --> 00:31:34,357
Same here, Bart.
616
00:31:34,426 --> 00:31:37,060
Hey, I hope you don't mind,
I got you a little present.
617
00:31:40,899 --> 00:31:44,468
Whoa! Is that Nelson?
Stewie, what the deuce?
618
00:31:44,536 --> 00:31:45,735
Yes, I... Oh!
619
00:31:45,804 --> 00:31:47,571
Oh, that's nice.
You got that from me.
620
00:31:47,639 --> 00:31:50,474
'Cause, you know,
I was starting to worry
this was a one-way thing.
621
00:31:50,542 --> 00:31:51,974
You kidnapped him?
622
00:31:52,043 --> 00:31:53,944
I kidnapped all your enemies.
623
00:31:54,012 --> 00:31:57,781
Nelson,
Jimbo, Principal Skinner,
Sideshow Bob, Apu.
624
00:31:57,850 --> 00:32:00,216
I know Apu's not
your enemy, but I just
625
00:32:00,285 --> 00:32:02,897
wanted to say,
"I took Apu."
626
00:32:04,456 --> 00:32:07,135
That is funny!
But the rest of this?
It's messed up, man.
627
00:32:07,159 --> 00:32:08,692
I know!
Isn't it awesome?
628
00:32:08,760 --> 00:32:11,139
So, how do you
want to keep in touch?
Facebook? Twitter?
629
00:32:11,163 --> 00:32:14,164
Late-night phone calls
lying on our tummies
with our feet up in the air?
630
00:32:14,233 --> 00:32:17,345
Stewie, I don't think
we can be friends.
You freak me out.
631
00:32:17,369 --> 00:32:20,003
Bart,
if we don't keep in touch,
I'll kill myself.
632
00:32:20,072 --> 00:32:21,649
That's what I'm talking about.
633
00:32:21,673 --> 00:32:22,873
Later, dude!
634
00:32:23,942 --> 00:32:26,142
Later, dude.
635
00:32:57,308 --> 00:32:58,308
Aw.
636
00:33:00,412 --> 00:33:03,547
Hey, Griffin.
Sorry about your job.
637
00:33:03,615 --> 00:33:05,915
I was just sticking up for Duff.
638
00:33:05,984 --> 00:33:08,351
I love Duff.
And Duff loves me.
639
00:33:08,420 --> 00:33:11,221
Duff can keep a secret.
Duff never says no.
640
00:33:11,290 --> 00:33:14,491
Duff is more
experimental than any
partner I've ever had.
641
00:33:14,560 --> 00:33:17,672
Anyway, the point is, I'm sorry.
642
00:33:17,696 --> 00:33:19,374
You know, when I
first met you, I thought,
643
00:33:19,398 --> 00:33:22,999
"Hey, I love this guy!
This is the funniest
guy I've ever met.
644
00:33:23,068 --> 00:33:24,967
"I'm gonna quote this
guy to all my friends.
645
00:33:25,036 --> 00:33:26,969
"I love his town,
I love his family."
646
00:33:27,038 --> 00:33:30,307
But now,
I think I speak for
all of us when I say,
647
00:33:30,375 --> 00:33:32,275
I am over the Simpsons!
648
00:33:32,344 --> 00:33:34,189
What are you saying?
649
00:33:34,213 --> 00:33:36,346
I'm saying the Simpsons suck!
650
00:33:36,415 --> 00:33:37,848
Why, you...
651
00:34:05,043 --> 00:34:06,876
Ow.
652
00:34:06,945 --> 00:34:08,389
What the hell?
That really hurts.
653
00:34:08,413 --> 00:34:11,681
No, it doesn't! I do it
to my son all the time.
654
00:34:11,750 --> 00:34:14,117
You strangle your son?
That's insane!
655
00:34:14,186 --> 00:34:16,720
No wonder he's fat and stupid
and masturbates all the time.
656
00:34:16,788 --> 00:34:18,021
That's your son!
657
00:34:50,555 --> 00:34:51,555
Phew!
658
00:34:58,597 --> 00:35:01,130
Hey! Knock it off!
There's a kid back there!
659
00:35:01,199 --> 00:35:03,132
I'm in danger.
660
00:35:44,108 --> 00:35:46,308
Hey, that's no fair.
I don't got none of them.
661
00:35:54,419 --> 00:35:55,419
Uh-oh.
662
00:36:04,662 --> 00:36:05,662
Uh-oh.
663
00:36:22,680 --> 00:36:23,680
Ooh.
664
00:37:01,486 --> 00:37:02,518
Damn it!
665
00:37:07,292 --> 00:37:10,060
And remember, kids,
TV violence is fine
666
00:37:10,128 --> 00:37:11,895
as long as you
don't show a nipple.
667
00:37:30,181 --> 00:37:34,283
Perfect.
The earthlings are
destroying themselves.
668
00:37:34,352 --> 00:37:36,419
Yeah, it's really great,
isn't it, guys?
669
00:37:36,488 --> 00:37:38,154
We went to summer camp together.
670
00:37:43,895 --> 00:37:45,829
Bye! Thanks for having me.
671
00:37:53,772 --> 00:37:57,674
It appears that I
am now the only one
with radioactive powers,
672
00:37:57,743 --> 00:38:00,810
which will allow me
to unleash my fury...
673
00:38:00,879 --> 00:38:02,779
Oh, I talked too long.
674
00:38:33,545 --> 00:38:34,689
We're gonna make it!
675
00:38:34,713 --> 00:38:35,978
Trust me, we're not.
676
00:38:59,938 --> 00:39:00,938
Whoo-hoo!
677
00:39:01,706 --> 00:39:02,805
Road House.
678
00:40:22,821 --> 00:40:25,187
Say hi to Maude Flanders.
679
00:40:27,158 --> 00:40:29,892
No. You say hi
to Muriel Goldman.
680
00:40:29,961 --> 00:40:31,201
Who?
681
00:41:01,926 --> 00:41:03,671
What are you still doing here?
682
00:41:03,695 --> 00:41:05,473
I think you're gonna
get a kick out of this.
683
00:41:05,497 --> 00:41:07,263
You're parked
behind me at your place.
684
00:41:07,332 --> 00:41:08,731
That is funny.
685
00:41:08,800 --> 00:41:10,300
Hey, listen, I...
686
00:41:10,368 --> 00:41:11,967
I'm sorry we fought.
687
00:41:12,036 --> 00:41:14,337
I just wanted to
make you laugh and cry.
688
00:41:14,406 --> 00:41:16,672
You see, I'm a Family Guy.
689
00:41:16,741 --> 00:41:18,007
I understand.
690
00:41:18,075 --> 00:41:19,942
I'm a The Simpsons.
691
00:41:20,011 --> 00:41:23,813
Look, even if we
don't work as best pals,
I respect you.
692
00:41:23,882 --> 00:41:26,060
You, too.
Let's just agree
to stay
693
00:41:26,084 --> 00:41:28,451
a half hour away
from each other.
694
00:41:28,519 --> 00:41:30,719
With a pile of
garbage between us.
695
00:41:32,790 --> 00:41:35,157
Worst chicken fight ever.
696
00:41:40,331 --> 00:41:42,731
It sure is nice to
be back in Quahog.
697
00:41:42,767 --> 00:41:46,302
Oh, and thank God
all the commotion
about Dad's comic blew over.
698
00:41:46,371 --> 00:41:48,905
Oh, my God, I had a comic?
That's hilarious!
699
00:41:48,974 --> 00:41:51,185
Well, you may not be
a cartoonist anymore,
700
00:41:51,209 --> 00:41:53,709
but you are a local hero
for defending our beer,
701
00:41:53,778 --> 00:41:56,891
and apparently,
that's more important
than hating women.
702
00:41:56,915 --> 00:41:59,949
So here you go,
a Pawtucket Patriot Ale.
703
00:42:00,018 --> 00:42:01,484
What? I don't understand.
704
00:42:01,552 --> 00:42:03,664
Ain't the brewery
out of business?
We lost a court case.
705
00:42:03,688 --> 00:42:06,167
Yes, we lost,
but how are they
gonna enforce it?
706
00:42:06,191 --> 00:42:08,169
What, are they gonna come here?
707
00:42:08,193 --> 00:42:10,437
I think we know
that's never
gonna happen.
708
00:42:10,461 --> 00:42:12,939
Hey, Stewie,
I'm sorry Bart didn't
want to be your friend.
709
00:42:12,963 --> 00:42:15,831
What? No!
What are you talking about?
He was lame.
710
00:42:15,900 --> 00:42:18,033
If you ask me, he kind
of sounded like a girl.
711
00:42:18,102 --> 00:42:20,447
Really?
Kind of seemed
like you idolized him.
712
00:42:20,471 --> 00:42:23,205
And I can
understand losing a friend
and feeling rejected.
713
00:42:23,274 --> 00:42:27,043
Course you can!
You're a loser.
But not me. I'm a lone wolf.
714
00:42:27,112 --> 00:42:29,352
Speaking of which,
I'm gonna go howl
at the moon.
715
00:42:29,381 --> 00:42:31,347
Don't need nobody.
716
00:43:00,211 --> 00:43:01,578
Shh.
717
00:43:01,646 --> 00:43:04,847
♪ And now
the show is over now ♪